Connection is important both to us parents and to our children. It helps in strengthening our relationship with our children. A connection is the only way children willingly follow our rules and cooperate with us. But many parents face a lot of difficulties in building a connection and strengthening their relationship with their children. Some of the habits which should be inculcated by us to improve our relationship with our children are described below.
1. Lot of hugs a day
Hug your child everyday as many times as you can. A hug improves the intimacy between you and your child. Hugs also make your child feel more secure and boost his/her self-esteem. Hugging is good for the body and the soul of your child and lot of studies in the past proved that human touch is crucial for growth and development.
2. Connect with your child before transitions
Connect with your child before transitions as children generally have a hard time transitioning from one thing to another. Children generally face lot of difficulty in the morning time in transitioning themselves from sleep into the executive functions. You can make such transitions easier by connecting with them through simple tricks like looking into their eyes lovingly, calling your child by his/her name, making him/her to giggle, etc.
3. Listen and empathize
Connecting with your kids starts with listening and empathizing with them. Empathizing with your kids will make your kids know that you are seeing things from their perspective, ensure them that you treat them with respect and look for win-win solutions. It will also help you in understanding the reasons for your child’s behavior which may look crazy to you sometimes.
4. Play
Playing with your child will help you in connecting with your child by stimulating hormones like endorphins and oxytocin in both of you. Make playfulness a daily habit which gives your child a chance to work through the anxieties and upsets which can make him/her feel disconnected to you. Play helps to make kids cheerful and make them to cooperate with you better.
5. Turn off gadgets when interacting with your child
Do not let any technology gadgets like mobile phones, iPods, and iPads come between you and your child. Keep such gadgets away when interacting with your child. Using gadgets might make your child think that you are neglecting him/her and something else is more important to you than he/she. This is more important when you are traveling in a car because the lack of eye contact in the car takes the pressure off for you and your kid and you can open up and share more easily. Alternately, you can also allow your child to sit with you and interact with your gadgets whenever it is feasible.
6. Show up
Never forget to show up whenever your child asks for you. Whether it is his/her birthday party or a function in his/her school, be there when ever your child needs your presence. You may not be able to make it all the time. But if you can make it a habit, you will find yourself doing it more and more consistently.
As parenting is often considered as the toughest job on earth, the only way to bond with our children is to build daily habits of connection. It is never too late to inculcate these habits.